Sunday, December 07, 2008

Happy Birthday To Me

The clock struck the midnight hour and I popped the cork of the bottle of champagne I bought to celebrate my birthday with. Yes, it's my birthday today. "What do you want for your birthday?", I've been asked. What I want is for the sleepless nights and the ache in my heart from the pain he has caused me again to disappear . I want the doctor who told me that not only do I have a "mass" in my left breast but two nodules in my right breast that must be removed immediately to say she made a mistake. I want to not be so scared of the "C" word. But what I want I cant have. So, I'll just sit here, in the red cocktail dress that I bought today in an effort to feel good and look pretty, when all I feel like to do is climb back in bed. I will blow out the candles on my birthday cake knowing full well that not one wish will come true this year.